Funeral Precession
by yukiislikesnow
Summary: It's a fitting day for a funeral precession it's raining. Sasuke would've liked it that way I think. ONESHOT sad, character death sasunaru


Title: Funeral Precession

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto…(that makes me cry inside)

A/N: Not much to say, it's sad, there's character death, and it's yaoi but sorry fellow citrus lovers, it doesn't even qualify as lime…orange maybe? Reviews are highly appreciated and flames will be laughed at then used to toast my marshmallows.

A fitting day for a funeral precession; it's raining. It only seems fair that the sky should cry for those who cannot bring themselves to do so. He came back. He, Sasuke Uchiha, had finally come back and of his own free will. As it turns out the cursed seal on his neck influenced his every decision. He had been trapped in soul, and as soon as he entered Oto, body as well. Tsunade managed to inform a select few that Sasuke had been molested and/or raped every day for the three years he had been in Orochimaru's care. I remember she called him "A pedophile the likes of which I never wish to hear of again." It was a happy few months. I got his second kiss, a real second kiss, not that crap Orochimaru forced onto him. I even got to sleep with him, in both senses of the word. I was bottom of course; he would risk a relapse if I topped him.

I cannot begin to comprehend why he would do what he did or what it must've been like to live and die the way he did. All I'm sure of is how happy I was in those few months. For just a few months I was able to turn away from all the pain and suffering and turn into a warm, needy embrace. Whenever tears were shed they were acknowledged, the problems dealt with, now who will cry with me? Right now I'd rather sit in the rain 'til I catch my own death then tread home and not see his brooding face. It isn't home without him there; it's just a house.

An empty house seems fitting for me now; the empty echoes of shattered dreams and lost hope are easier to deal with than sad questions from a child or strange looks from an aggravated roommate. Somehow the thought of my life returning to what it used to be isn't as heart wrenching as one would think. Over the past seventeen years I've grown accustom to living alone and for the most part being unwanted. Slipping back into my old routine shouldn't be hard, and that, that is what scares me. It's almost terrifying to know that I'm so used to being treated like a worn out doll thrown to the trash that any other type of life is surreal. Life with Sasuke as a lover was just that, surreal. There was never a day when I didn't think about how it could all be a dream or how I was beyond lucky to have him even look at me in the way he did. It didn't matter to me that he was "used goods", as some village elders had called him, or that he was in constant need of reassurance and as mentally stable as a ramen cup on a roller-coaster.

He was mine and I was his and now I have to share him with the ground and all those bugs Shino seems to be fond of. Shino just left actually, for some reason he stuck around longer than the others, but I'm alone now. Alone, a feeling I'm all too familiar with. Loneliness brought the two of us grief, brought the two of us together, and in the end I suppose that's what brought Sasuke to his death. He once told me that loneliness was a crushing thing and it seems almost morbidly poetic that he should die with his bones crushed. I wonder if he planned it through, and if he did how long did he hold onto that plan? When I heard the noise I stumbled out of bed and started asking if he was okay. I yelled "Teme" until the panic set in, and then I used Sasuke. I found him after about my second call of his real name lying in the garden. It was almost as if he was taking a nap, if only his head hadn't landed that way I could've lied to myself a bit longer.

Technically he didn't jump off the roof. No, instead he spread his arms like a bird and leaned forward. There was a chance he could've lived but Sasuke chose to eliminate that chance all together. He put a seal on himself that bound all of his chakra. It was one of mine. Seeing that seal on him added insult to injury and I pray to every deity I know hoping that it wasn't Sasuke's intention to hurt me by using one of my seals. But even if it wasn't his intent that's what I feel. One more burden on my back, the death of my lover, my reason to live, my light; it may have been a weak light, a feeble breath away from desolation, but it was mine.

Now whom will I live for? Who will have me? No one. And what's worse is that I don't think I can bring myself to dying the way he did. Stopping my own heart from beating after Sasuke did the same would be an insult to both of us I think. But as I look over the rain-weighted grass towards my house, not my home, I feel something lodge in my throat and drop in my stomach. _Will it always feel this bad?_

The rain is falling harder now and it's just barely washing away my tears. Soon it will stop all together and then where will I be, with no rain to hide my sadness and no Sasuke to comfort me I have nothing. No one wants me anymore, not Iruka, not Kakashi, not Sakura. Now all I can do is visit this rock, visit like Sensei does. It seems ironic that all my life past, present, and future, can be summarized by two stones: the Kyuubi memorial, and Sasuke's tombstone. No matter how far I run there will always be a cloud behind me and a bird above me. My cloud is my demon and my bird is -**my- **Sasuke, so I'll never be alone. Instead I'll be forced to balance my evils with the few blessings that come my way and hope for dryer skies.

It's a fitting day for a funeral precession; Sasuke always told me he preferred his sunshine blonde.

All right so that was a sad little one-shot I've been sitting on for quite some time. I'm always better at one-shots. I just like the way I can make it final or trail it off w/out having to worry about making it work later.

Well please read and review. I do love this pairing and it made me sad to write this but I got a muse and I'm not one to ignore random inspiration.


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